The Lord of the Flies Phenomenon

There is a direct correlation between small spaces and a persons emotional response. The link actually creates a hyper state of emotional claustrophobia and the subconscious desire to free oneself from the confinement creating a physiological condition similar to that of a flight or fight response.

The mother should have known better. She likes to think of herself as a veteran caregiver to infants and toddlers alike but this morning thought she would throw caution to the wind and assume all the acceptable risks of taking multiple children with her to the brunettes biannual eye exam. In so much as is humanly possible the mother tries to never travel outside of a 15 mile radius of her home during this season of life. Specialists of course are never close, so the trek will be long but the blonde is at school, the baby should likely nap, and the brunette and the boy are always the best versions of themselves in the morning. Challenge accepted.

As with all doctors appointments, even when you are early the doctor never seems to have to abide by social mores and actually keep the stated appointment time. You have conditioned yourself to accept waiting will be part of the experience. The mother, boy, brunette and baby find themselves at the precipus of a social experiment waiting in a large room with flickering fluorescent lighting, outdated magazines and motel art that seem to reflect a tribute to birds of the world covering the walls.

After waiting an undisclosed period of time, they enter a small room and undergo a small gathering of data (otherwise known as a nurse’s stalling technique to mask the prolonged waiting) the brunette receives a series of eye drops to dilate her pupils (the brunette strongly is apposed to the procedure and the mother noting this feels like in her spare time some of the unnatural levels of strength it took to confine a scrappy two year old in the doctors office might be served to make her some spending money on the weekends in the mixed martial arts arena (the mother makes a mental note to look into registering herself under the monicker “Whispering Viper” in her free time.)

After the drops have been applied the tribe is returned to the large room to wait some more. With this third migration, the mother notices a shift in the children’s behavior. The mothers eye begins to twitch in rhythm with the flicker of the light ballast that is clearly on its last leg directly over her head.

It’s finally the brunettes turn to see the doctor and time to enter the dreaded small room. The mother is entirely sure she did not drink enough coffee this morning for what is about to unfold.

The boy who has been separated from technology for over 90 minutes starts to hit a metamorphic state of restlessness.

The baby who lives as the guest of honor in her own life and is used to a higher than normal level of doting from her older siblings and has not felt the glow of a spot light on her for entirely too long begins to wriggle, and the brunette now quite literally looking as if she is demon possessed with her dilated eyes are all escorted into the room to await the doctors arrival.

The time that lapses was likely no more than fifteen minutes and the nurse who ushers them in insightfully senses the storm cloud forming and places a show onto the tv.

The selection… The Pink Panther…the mother is now quite certain this woman does not have children as in case you were unaware of or simply have forgotten the Pink Panther does not speak. He moves silently and does not at all do anything that is nearly exciting enough to capture the attention of the boy, brunette and certainly not the baby who has hit a full cat like arching meltdown in her stroller.

The boy (who by all regards is normally a model child most likely in a state of technology withdrawal) begins to act in an all together unattractive and antagonistic manner touching everything in the room even dispute the mothers repeated attempts to get him to remain in the chair. The brunette….well let’s just say the confinement creates an unexplainable state of paranoia in her. In spite of the fact that no one is actually touching her just continues to roam the room arms crossed muttering “stop bothering me!”

The doctor arrives.

The appointment is completed in moments.

The mother cannot get back to her vehicle fast enough.

The brunette and the baby fall asleep in the car before leaving the parking lot.

The boy is lulled into a transcendental comma by the DVD player in the van.

The mother finds herself humming the theme song to The Pink Panther.

The Motherhood in Technicolor Memo: Remember small spaces create a Lord of the flies affect in your children revealing their most primal and unfiltered traits. At times children can test the true measure of a parents patience. I’d like to say we are always successful in embracing the calm version of ourselves but that is not always the case. Just remember parenting is repetition and sometimes we are the ones that might need the gentle reminder to try better next time.

Remember this phenomenon when scheduling future appointments.


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Author: Summer Smith

Summer Smith is a speaker, writer, and motherhood blogger. She and her family are currently navigating the suburbs of Northern Virginia. As the mother to four young children, Summer maintains her sanity thanks to her sense of humor, copious amounts of coffee, and Amazon Prime. Maya Angelou once said, when reflecting on her childhood, that her mother left an impression like technicolor stars in the midnight sky. Influenced by these words, Summer blogs at her website Motherhood in Technicolor, and can also be found on her Motherhood in Technicolor Facebook page.

One thought on “The Lord of the Flies Phenomenon

  1. sandie

    I can’t stand dr appointments and often experience this kind of day. But yours just seems more humorous to me. Great visual of the visit

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